I wish someone could cure my of my loneliness. My deep and dark impending loneliness. Do you ever feel lonely? Recently I have been feeling so lonely. It’s like that doom and gloom that you will be lonely forever. What should I do? I’ve tried reaching out to people. Telling them I’m lonely and need a friend. Trying to look for jobs. It’s just that loneliness is depriving me of something. Something I’m longing for. A group of friends? That special someone that will take all my loneliness away. What will it be?
I never used to be like this. I’m not really sure what happened. You see ever since my psychosis I’ve been so traumatized by it that now when I’m lonely, it’s the worst. I mean the worst. I used to be okay with being alone or at least I thought I was. Sometimes I think about that special someone that will take all my problems away. Does that really exist? I’m not even really sure. I’m learning DBT right now and I have to learn to sit with the feelings of being lonely. I have to love and accept those feelings. Splash cold water on my face. Dig my toes into the sand and learn to breath in and out and follow my breath. All these things help; however they don’t cure the loneliness just help you to cope better.
I keep thinking what’s the point, what’s the use. I use these skills and still I want to have a community of people just like me that I feel comfortable with or that special someone to share those moments with so I don’t feel so alone in my dark little cave. What will it take? Who will I be? What is going to happen? I could ruminate for hours, but having skills totally helps. I’m breathing in the world WISE and breathing out the word MIND. I’m looking at my surroundings and feeling the comfyness of the chair I sit in. These things help. At the end of the day I just want to feel good. Don’t we all? That’s the goal and I’m going to keep working at it. Will you to?